Local Beauty Secrets Revealed

Local Beauty Secrets Revealed

I’ve always wondered why the farm women in my small rural town are so beautiful. I’ve speculated that it was the hundred inches of annual rainfall, or the mist from the large cow manure sprayers that perfume our air, even the faintly salty breeze off the ocean.

But, now the holy mysteries have been revealed.

On our way back from the weekly grocery store pilgrimage, we were commenting on my choice of shampoo I bought today.

“I’m just ready for something different,” I said. “Time for a change.”

My wife agreed, saying that a friend of hers, a dairy wife, recently gave her some new shampoo for her birthday.

She purchased it at the local feed store, apparently the local rival to Paul Mitchell, Revlon, and other boutique beauty supplies.

“It’s ‘Mane ‘n Tail Shampoo’,” my wife said. “They use it on horses, and it makes the horses’ manes and tails shiny and voluminous.”

“Yes, I could see why one would want one’s horses to have shiny and voluminous manes and tails,” I said.

“The dairy wives, too,” my wife replied. “They use it themselves. And, you can buy it in bulk at the feed store.

“I’ve used it, too. It does a great job,” she said, adding a loud horse snort and neigh.

Struggling to keep the car on the road, our laughter filling the car, I barely made it home and rushed to my computer. With a quick Google search, I found myself on the Mane ‘n Tail website, looking at all their equine beauty aids and glorious testimonials.

Nothing from Mr. Ed, or this year’s winner of the Kentucky Derby, but lots of rave reviews from satisfied customers, all apparently now displaying voluminous hair.

And, then, I discovered another product, one my wife now also wants to try — Mane ‘n Tail’s Hoofmaker. A happy customer wrote:

“My nails were in very bad shape. I started using Mane ‘n Tail Hoofmaker and saw a difference in one week. I’ve been using it for a month now and love it. My nails are no longer brittle and breaking.

“–M.R., Fresno, California.”

No endorsements yet for any oats or hay, or the Triple Crown Diet on the website. But, I bet they are working on a special nutritional supplement to keep one’s coat shiny, and heal saddle sores. I’d be interested in that.

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